Work and play for the Insomniac

As the sky turned black and the soft colours of the old living room faded into dull shades of grey, a parade of lights danced against the walls. The sound of button clicks cut through the silence of the night, followed by exclamations of ''OIII'', ''HOY'' and ''HAAAAA'' from the old box television. Eventually, when the sunlight started to seep through the curtains and the birds began to chirp, I would rest my GameCube controller in front of me and wake up my father. 

After all, it was breakfast time.

Upon starting this blog I have asked myself many questions. What do I possibly write about? How can I make my blog interesting for others to read? Will anyone actually bother reading my posts? Unfortunately there is no definite answer for these questions, Instead I will just have to go with it. This post is quite a lighthearted take on the personal experiences I have had across the years with insomnia. I apologise, for it is probably going to be a long post.

Early Years 8-10

The opening paragraph is a very true story which I'm sure many can relate to. However, that wasn't the real beginning of my notable experiences. The story really begins on the 25th December 2002 at 04:00, as a 8 year old girl stays up next to her sleeping cousin waiting for Christmas. At this time I no longer believed in Santa or the tooth fairy but I certainly believed in presents and I couldn't wait.

As the clock reached 6 I deemed this a suitable time to wake all the others. Running down the stairs me and my cousin rushed to the mountain of presents awaiting us but no present could match the identical rectangle boxes which appeared for us that year. Tearing at the paper it was none other than the Ps2 I had been waiting for..

It was around the time at the age of 10, that my sleeping habits started to appear. My dad had little to no rules. So naturally, we played games until the sun came up. Our favourite being a less well known game called Project Eden. Even when we eventually completed the game, we would simply start it again.

Nintendo Years 10-14

I will keep the Nintendo years short as I can because it is essentially the same as my Early years. Although I had always played Nintendo in the form of my Gameboy this time is special because at the age of 10 I started playing one of my favourite games of all time;

Zelda Windwaker on the Gamecube. If you did not know what sounds I was (terribly) trying to portray in my opening paragraph, it was this game. When I couldn't sleep at night I would plug in my GameCube or play my Gameboy with a flashlight. (Flashlight for no blacklight! So painful.) I stuck with my old Gamboy until the shiny DS came out. Since 2004, I had kept my first DS until it eventually died this summer, may it rest in peace.

Exam Years 14-16

It is at this age that my actual Insomnia develops. I no longer stay up to play games, yet I battle with the inability to sleep at night. Some nights I wouldn't sleep at all, other nights I would drift off at about 4-5am to wake at 7 for school. To give me something to do I started playing with my friends in an online community which I became completely absorbed into. It was in this game that I didn't actually have to spend nights alone anymore. Although we were there for different reasons, we were all awake.

This was fine for me, until Exam time. Up until my exams my sleeping behavior had never been a problem for me. At this time of stress and panic my Insomnia worsened and my sleeping cycle was so erratic that it eventually caused me to miss my last French exam. Obviously my teachers were worried when a predicted A* student doesn't turn up for an exam. Regardless of my slip up I pass all my exams and moved to Cornwall for college.

College Years 16-19

When I moved the biggest change for me was having no computer. This meant goodbye fun online community, hello coursework. After my exams had cleared and I was free of games my Insomnia seemed to have lifted for a while. Naturally I turned on games being the sole reason for my troubles. I was to study fine art and that would be that. Until just 4 months later I find myself in a sleepless state once more. I began to dread the night when people would leave to go to bed and I would slip under my duvet closing and opening my eyes hoping to sleep. 

I realised something after countless attempts of rest, that this time given to me could be put to better use. It was then that I created  what led to a full sketchbook of work which was only made between the hours of 12 at night till 7 in the morning.

This was my way of coping at the time. Unfortunately, long story short, it became too much and I had to restart college the next year. I have since tried many things to 'cure' my sleeping issues but none do much for me.

I went back to study game design instead, which I successfully completed without much bad interference from my insomnia. Many nights I would sit up and go through projects or write up essays. I would be lying if I said that was the attitude I had all the time about my being awake, after all I was still a gamer and I'm sure that one to ten extra League of Legends games a night didn't hurt.... 

I have a lot of people to thank at this time though because it's those amazing people that helped me through it and were the only reason I went in to college sometimes. How can one fall asleep in lesson when your derping around on camera?

We did actually do work...

University years Now-

This chapter has just begun. Coming to terms with it, I know that most of my work will be completed at night and almost all of my blogs will be posted at 5am but hey that's just the way I work.

Thanks for taking the time to read my blog,

See you around folks

About Me

Before I begin I wanted to explain that the name of my blog stems from the idea of a group of pandas making a cake, if that wasn't obvious. Apparently in my train of thought somewhere this was amusing. I mean they have huge paws and no thumbs so I guess cracking an egg would be funny to see. Right? Also in this name I have cleverly disguised the word pancake, which happens to be my favourite food. Coincidence? I think not.

Anyway, my names Abigail but please call me Abbie. I don't really know where to begin with about me but here goes. Currently I am a first year studying Game art design at De Montford University. I spent the majority of my life growing up in Dudley, in Birmingham however have not acquired the accent. Score one for me. Since the age of 16 I have lived in Cornwall and Essex. Although I don't mind the amount of moving around I've done the past 3 years, I feel I'm never in one place long enough get comfortable. Hopefully though I can spend my next 3 years here in Leicester.

Drawing is something I have always done since I can remember and I know that a lot of people say that. Academically I had several options to persue but I always knew that I wanted to be an 'Artist' for a living. Some of my earliest memories as a child were playing games with my dad, little did I know the impact this would have on my future. That which was a child pass time became a full time hobby for me. Sometimes I'l admit, this was bordering on 'addiction' but I'm sure I'm not the only one. When I started looking at colleges and universities it was only then I realized that I could potentially design games for a living. In my mind it just made sense. I still love games and you could probably talk to me for hours (if you were bored enough) about them but now, as I'm older, I put the brakes on my game time quite a lot in order to take my future seriously.

Okay wait, I'm sorry. It was getting a little intense there wasn't it? Usually I would spam Gif's at this point because who does not wan't to see a cat that is dressed up as a shark, on top of a remote controlled device, chasing a duck around the kitchen? Or maybe that just my sense of humor... So a little more about myself and then you can erase you ever read this and go get that food you left in the oven and forgot about. (I keep doing that).

Just some quick general knowledge about me;

I'm an incredibly shy in person around people I don't know. It's my second week here and I haven't really melded into a group yet probably because of that. If I'm fixated on something I could be there for hours, honestly. Throughout my time at Cornwall I did a lot of outdoor sports which I love such as surfing, rock climbing and horse riding. It is probably notable that I collect Disney? each to their own. It is also probably notable that I'm writing this at 5am...

On that note, I shall go to bed. Thanks for reading and see you around.